You are competing only with yourself, not with the others

Have you read my previous post?

http://thenext15000days.blogspot.com/2022/06/done-skipping-life.html

I wanted to share with you the moment when I decided to attend the anniversary.

I have a friend who has a wonderful 10-year-old son. He got cancer when he was 3 years old and for many months it looked that he won't survive. Luckily we have good hospitals and they were able to cure him. He is completely healthy now.  But all the drugs left him with some minor learning difficulties. 

He has a silly teacher whose hobby is to make a special list: she sorts all her 25 pupils according to the average grades in the school year. This perfect little boy always comes in the last third of the list. 

I heard his mom encourage him before one of the tests: "You are competing only with yourself, not with the others." 

Exactly! 

I though to myself - if this brave little boy has the courage to go to the class every single day, I can have the courage to attend the anniversary once a year.

***

What made me happy today: fresh cherries picked up by my mom.

Done skipping life

We have a beautiful tradition with school-friends from high school (we were together from the age 15 to 19 years). We meet every year - first Friday in June. 

But for the last 15 years I didn't attend the anniversary. I dreaded all the baby talk & children talk & unwanted questions. 

This year I just decided that I am almost 50 and that I am done with skipping life.

I went and it was nice. 

It was lovely to talk about old memories.  

There were only three moments that I didn't feel comfortable.

1.  One school friend greeted the group when entering to the restaurant: "Do we already have any grandchildren??".  

2. One school friend boasted with his first two kids who are in early 20s and how he and his wife got a surprise third child and how a newborn is enriching their lives.

3. One school friend - a mother of two - asked me: "So Klara, how old are your children now?" She asked me the very same question in the last 10 anniversaries that I attended.

The remark 1 and 2 didn't make me angry nor sad - they weren't addressed directly to me. But remark 3 was. 

I am very glad that I did find the strenght and went. Why would I have to miss any more of the life?  I have missed - because of my infertility - already way too much.

A prayer

 

How to put million thoughts into few lines? I'll try. 

Yesterday  when I was cycling with my husband we passed by a church that had beautiful roses. I don't pray often but yesterday I stopped for a minute to say a prayer. 

I deeply admire the courage of Ukrainian people fighting for their country and for their freedom. The first prayer was for Ukraine and its people.

The second prayer was for me. I have just had minor surgery, skin cancer removal. I'm still waiting for the results of pathology. 

Hallein, Austria

 

My husband had to go to Austria for one day and he invited me to go with him. It was a lot of driving, but I am very glad I went with him. On the way back we visited this beautiful medieval town: Hallein (very close to Salzburg). 

This one day road trip reminded us how much we love travelling!

The seaside photos

I have spent 10 years of my life writing a blog about life after infertility. I am glad I've been writing about that - it has helped me with the healing. But now I think I am done with it. The infertility took away too much from me. Now I want to focus on the life that I have and enjoy in small things.

But even if I don't want to mention  that I don't have children, the fact is still there. I had a week off work and I wanted to go somewhere... just to change the scenery and have a little break. And I literally had no one to go with (my husband was very busy with work and all the rest have lives of their own that do not include having time for a holiday with me). 

Instead of regretting being so alone I just booked the room at the seaside and went alone. I had a lovely time! I did a lot of walking and I even swam in the Adriatic for the very first time this year. I also took a first cycling tour, the ice cream was delicious!

Invitation for a cup of coffee :)

 

I am sharing with you pictures from the favourite part of my country. I took a day off work to go for a walk here. It was just picture perfect (despite the cold wind). 

More info about this lake: https://www.bohinj.si/en/ 

More info about my country: https://www.slovenia.info/en 

Additional advantage if you choose my country for your next holiday: You can have a cup of coffee or tea with me :) 

The war in Europe

I love Lilly's latest post... her thoughts about the war in Ukraine are exactly the same as mine. I don't have anything to add, so I am just sharing her post:

 https://ablanknewpagebl.blogspot.com/2022/03/are-topics-i-wanted-to-write-about-in.html