Saturday, June 11, 2022

Done skipping life

We have a beautiful tradition with school-friends from high school (we were together from the age 15 to 19 years). We meet every year - first Friday in June. 

But for the last 15 years I didn't attend the anniversary. I dreaded all the baby talk & children talk & unwanted questions. 

This year I just decided that I am almost 50 and that I am done with skipping life.

I went and it was nice. 

It was lovely to talk about old memories.  

There were only three moments that I didn't feel comfortable.

1.  One school friend greeted the group when entering to the restaurant: "Do we already have any grandchildren??".  

2. One school friend boasted with his first two kids who are in early 20s and how he and his wife got a surprise third child and how a newborn is enriching their lives.

3. One school friend - a mother of two - asked me: "So Klara, how old are your children now?" She asked me the very same question in the last 10 anniversaries that I attended.

The remark 1 and 2 didn't make me angry nor sad - they weren't addressed directly to me. But remark 3 was. 

I am very glad that I did find the strenght and went. Why would I have to miss any more of the life?  I have missed - because of my infertility - already way too much.


  1. I'm so glad you went! I'm so glad you enjoyed it! Yes, situations #1 and #2 are annoying, but #3 is just thoughtless. I'm glad they didn't damper your fun. I missed a lot of years too. I don't want to miss any more.

  2. Dear Klara,

    I am so glad you decided to go. Yay! I know how much it took for you to feel ready to face this kind of situation, so it is excellent <3!

    But question no. 3 is really awful. I mean, "Do you have kids?" is difficult enough to answer. This one brings it to a whole other level. I cannot believe how ignorant some people are. I really can't 🙄.

    Wishing you a beautiful summer weekend! Hugs.

  3. Klara, this is brilliant! I am so glad you went, and I totally agree - why should we miss out on more of our lives? I'm really glad you enjoyed it. And hopefully next year won't require quite so much strength to get there. Brava!

    I found comment #1 annoyed me too though. I rolled my eyes. And comment #3 - how stupid are they that they can't remember details like that? Argh! (My idea of your response: "You ask me this every year, and forget every year, so I'm not telling you anymore!")

  4. Yay for going! And boooo to the thoughtless comments. I love how you said you're done skipping life. I feel like that's another step in healing, is realizing that you don't need to skip things that used to be too painful. I'm glad you gathered your strength and went!