Saturday, June 25, 2022

Happy 31st birthday, sLOVEnia!

Today my country celebrates 31st birthday. 

It seems like yesterday - when we declared independence and immediately after that the Yugoslav army attacked our country. Luckily the war in Slovenia lasted only 10 days. I will never forget watching the images of the bombing and tanks and crying so much, I was scared for my family (I wasn't at home during the war - I was an Au Pair in London that summer). I was just a scared teenager 31 years ago.

But the horrible war in neighbouring Croatia and Bosnia lasted 4 years.

Since the Russian attack on Ukraine I appreciate living in the free independent country even more. 

I wish from the bottom of my heart that the people of Ukraine will live in peace and freedom soon again.


A photo: cute ducklings at a beautiful Slovenian alpine lake, photo taken by me

Sunday, June 12, 2022

You are competing only with yourself, not with the others

Have you read my previous post?

I wanted to share with you the moment when I decided to attend the anniversary.

I have a friend who has a wonderful 10-year-old son. He got cancer when he was 3 years old and for many months it looked that he won't survive. Luckily we have good hospitals and they were able to cure him. He is completely healthy now.  But all the drugs left him with some minor learning difficulties. 

He has a silly teacher whose hobby is to make a special list: she sorts all her 25 pupils according to the average grades in the school year. This perfect little boy always comes in the last third of the list. 

I heard his mom encourage him before one of the tests: "You are competing only with yourself, not with the others." 


I though to myself - if this brave little boy has the courage to go to the class every single day, I can have the courage to attend the anniversary once a year.


What made me happy today: fresh cherries picked up by my mom.

Saturday, June 11, 2022

Done skipping life

We have a beautiful tradition with school-friends from high school (we were together from the age 15 to 19 years). We meet every year - first Friday in June. 

But for the last 15 years I didn't attend the anniversary. I dreaded all the baby talk & children talk & unwanted questions. 

This year I just decided that I am almost 50 and that I am done with skipping life.

I went and it was nice. 

It was lovely to talk about old memories.  

There were only three moments that I didn't feel comfortable.

1.  One school friend greeted the group when entering to the restaurant: "Do we already have any grandchildren??".  

2. One school friend boasted with his first two kids who are in early 20s and how he and his wife got a surprise third child and how a newborn is enriching their lives.

3. One school friend - a mother of two - asked me: "So Klara, how old are your children now?" She asked me the very same question in the last 10 anniversaries that I attended.

The remark 1 and 2 didn't make me angry nor sad - they weren't addressed directly to me. But remark 3 was. 

I am very glad that I did find the strenght and went. Why would I have to miss any more of the life?  I have missed - because of my infertility - already way too much.

Monday, June 6, 2022

A prayer


How to put million thoughts into few lines? I'll try. 

Yesterday  when I was cycling with my husband we passed by a church that had beautiful roses. I don't pray often but yesterday I stopped for a minute to say a prayer. 

I deeply admire the courage of Ukrainian people fighting for their country and for their freedom. The first prayer was for Ukraine and its people.

The second prayer was for me. I have just had minor surgery, skin cancer removal. I'm still waiting for the results of pathology.