Wednesday, June 27, 2012

No, I do not have plenty of time



One of my favourite songs is Ti voglio tanto bene.  I really like the singer Gianna Nannini.

She had her first and only child when she was 54. I am happy for her, that she got what she always wanted.

But what I don't like at all is the fact how many celebrities are having children that late in life.
It gives the impression that it is possible to have children at ANY age.

So I hope I will never hear again that I have plenty of time to have children. I do not. I am over with hoping & praying.

Friday, June 22, 2012

No other life would I like to have more

I was just reading some new posts on the blogs of my childfree (not by choice) friends. One of my favourite blogs is Mali's blog. And her new post made me think of breastfeeding and that I had already written about it two years ago, as a guest blogger on Pamela's blog:

http://blog.silentsorority.com/2010/05/03/speaking-a-common-language-2.aspx

I wrote it under the name of Lucy. This was the name that we had chosen for our baby girl. But I do not want to use this name. I buried the name, together with our dream.

It was so lovely to read my words from more then two years ago. I remember how unhappy I was when I was writing it. I was crying so much. And - this year I don't remember crying even one single time. So, life does get easier, more beautiful.

Night is Magic







I just returned home, from the workshop that I attended for my job. I worked hard. And had great time at the same time.

Writing a blog influenced me. I am more focused to have as many happy moments that I can.

I finished working at 5pm yesterday, so I had free evening, just for myself. And I spent an amazing evening in Gardaland. Gardaland is an amusement park on the shore of Garda lake (the most beautiful lake in Italy).  I love love love Gardaland! Especially at night. Lots of families with small children already go home. And also buses with school children.

In peak season during the day the waiting lines for attractions can be up to 1 hour. But yesterday I never waited more then 5 minutes. So I could have 20 rides in 5 hours. Great, great, great!!!

This is the attraction that I love the most:





But there are also lots of other good ones.

There are sections dedicated only to families with toddlers. As you can imagine, I avoid those sections :)

Also my DH loves Gardaland. We were already here couple of times together. I wish he could be yesterday with me, he would love it!

It was so hot this week in Italy (36 C). So I ate mostly fresh apricots, nectarines, peaches.... it is the region of fruit. It was so delicious to eat fruit directly from orchards (I really do not like supermarket fruit).

I ate plenty of good ice cream.

So, life really is good!

I stayed in private B&B (really cosy, clean, super nice and not expensive). And the owner had a lovely 3 year old daughter. When I arrived the child asked me: "Avete dei bambini?". I just responded: "Purtroppo no."

Some years  ago this question would bring me to tears (since it was actually the first time that a child asked me whether I had kids... she didn't go to kindergarten so I guess was always looking forward to guests who came with kids).

This time I just responded the way it is. And I didn't feel bad. It is just the fact, that I do not have kids. Can not change it.

***

Yesterday evening I was actually happy not to have any small kids. I have seen people my age who were only in the parts of Gardaland that is meant for babies . And I could be only in the parts that I love (Raptor, Blue tornado etc. etc).

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

6 months



I just realized that I am celebrating 6 months this week since I started my blog.
Here is my first post (for new readers):
http://thenext15000days.blogspot.com/2011/12/living-new-happy-life-after.html

Thank you for all your kind comments, thoughts, support in the last 6 months.
And I am looking forward to writing my blog further.

By the way: do you know that in all this time I haven't got even one malicious comment?

I just don't have any time for writing now, I have to pack my bags for new business trip for few days.

Enjoy!

Friday, June 15, 2012

The most beautiful sea





Few days ago it was a birthday of Maria's husband, so I sent him an email with birthday wishes. And he sent back a long, beautiful and sad email. It made me sad, reading his email. How horrible must it be, to find the love of your life and then loose her so suddenly?

Anyway, although me & my DH didn't plan to go for summer holidays anywhere, I had a sudden feeling that all that we really have is NOW. So we have to take time for ourselves and do things that we like and go places that we enjoy.

We travelled quite a bit, but our top favourite sea is Dalmatia (in the south of Croatia). I love love swimming in the crystal clear sea there. I love lying on little white stones. I love the smell of Mediterranean. So - in one month time - we are going to the island of Brač . I am attaching a photo of the most beautiful beach there, taken two years ago.

We already stayed there 5 times (in the last 10 years), always in the same apartment. So - since we are regular clients, we immediately got confirmation, without even paying the deposit.

I am so  so looking forward to it!!!

Here is commercial for the ones who don't know this part of Europe:




Thursday, June 14, 2012

Non, je ne regrette rien

I had a lovely evening with my DH. We watched a movie La vie en rose about Edith Piaf:
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0450188/

It is a beautiful movie. How sad was Edith Piaf's life, full of tragedies!

I love her last song - and the most beautiful - Non, je ne regrette rien. For the first time in my life I really listened to the actual meaning of the words. So beautiful! So meaningful!



Here is translation: http://www.metrolyrics.com/non-je-ne-regrette-rien-lyrics-edith-piaf.html

The strange thing is that we already watched this movie 4 years ago and I did not like it that much. And yesterday I totally loved it. When I talked about it with my DH about this, he commented "you have obviously grown as a person in the last four years and now you are able to feel Edith Piaf's soul".

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

Being childfree & having enough time for healthy food



For the last few weeks I have been trying to eat as much healthy food as I can.

My today afternoon snack: 
- sweet cherries

My dinner:
- salad with beans (with olive oil & balsamic vinegar)


I just feel better after eating healthy!

The older as I get, eating fresh food, full of vitamins & minerals is becoming more and more important to me. Somehow it is becoming clearer to me that this is everything that I have - me, this moment and hopefully the next few decades.



PS: I am not specifying my breakfast and lunch, since they are not that healthy :)

Monday, June 11, 2012

I promised the photos.... here they are!








Here are some photos from last week. I spent some days in Italy. I was  in Venice only one afternoon & one evening and totally loved it! Despite all the tourists.

One of my coworkers couldn't go on a business trip (because of her children), so I was the replacement. How cool it is to be childfree and flexible????

I worked hard. But the afternoon and evening that I took only for myself, was just beautiful. I had this feeling - life is so beautiful! I just have to focus on the things that I do have. And not to mourn the things that are just not meant to be. At least not for me.

I ate lots of yummy Italian food. Drank some really tasty capuccinos. Enjoyed life.

Saturday, June 9, 2012

Little pink magnet in the back of the drawer

My sister stopped by today with her little daughter (2 years) and a newborn. They brought me a little magnet. Cute pink magnet with a picture of a picture perfect little girl.

I love my sister's daughter, I really do. But I just can not put this magnet on our fridge. A magnet with a picture of OUR baby was meant to be on our fridge. But there isn't any and there never will be.

I didn't have the heart to throw the magnet away (although I love to do this with all the objects that make me sad). So I just hid it in the darkest part of one of the drawers that I seldom use. So I can put it out only when the niece comes for a visit.

Life after infertility (little help for search engines)

My blog is about:

life after infertility
lewe na onvrugbaarheid
jeta pas varfëri
անպտղության
sonsuzluğun sonra həyat
antzutasuna ondoren bizi
жыццё пасля бясплоддзя
ঊষরতা পরে জীবন
живот след безплодие
la vida després de la infertilitat
生活后不孕
生活後不孕
život nakon neplodnosti
život po neplodnosti
liv efter infertilitet
leven na de onvruchtbaarheid
vivo post infertilidad
elu pärast viljatus
buhay pagkatapos ng kawalan ng katabaan
jälkeisestä elämästä hedelmättömyys
kehidupan setelah infertilitas
la vie après l'infertilité
vida tras a infertilidade
ცხოვრების შემდეგ უშვილობას
Leben nach der Unfruchtbarkeit
ζωή μετά από στειρότητα
વંધ્યત્વ પછી જીવન
lavi apre lakòz
बांझपन के बाद जीवन
utáni élet meddőség
líf eftir ófrjósemi
vita dopo l'infertilità
不妊後の生活
ಬಂಜೆತನ ನಂತರ ಜೀವನ
불임증 생활
vitam post infecunditate
dzīve pēc neauglību
gyvenimas po nevaisingumo
живот после неплодност
kehidupan selepas ketidaksuburan
ħajja wara infertilità
livet etter ufruktbarhet
życie po niepłodności
vida após a infertilidade
viaţa după infertilitate
жизнь после бесплодия
život po neplodnosti
življenje po neplodnosti
la vida después de la infertilidad
maisha baada ya utasa
livet efter infertilitet 
கருவுறாமை பிறகு வாழ்க்கை
సంతాన ప్రాప్తి లేకుండుట తర్వాత జీవితం
ชีวิตหลังภาวะมีบุตรยาก
infertilite sonra yaşam
життя після безпліддя
cuộc sống sau khi sinh
bywyd ar ôl anffrwythlondeb
לעבן נאָך ינפערטיליטי
الحياة بعد العقم
زندگی پس از ناباروری
بانجھ پن کے بعد زندگی
החיים לאחר פוריות
PS:  I didn't write for the whole week because I was on a business trip. I had a great time (although I missed my DH & beloved dog). I spent some days in the most beautiful city in this part of Europe.... I will write more next week (when I upload my photos). Photos tell more than thousands words! Anyway, I am really happy that I have a job where I can travel from time to time