Tuesday, September 4, 2012

19.213 kids

Yesterday was a tough day. It was the first day of a new school year. So the only topic everywhere, including all media, was school children.

There are 19.213 kids in the first grade in my country (total population: 2 million). If everything went well with my 1st IVF, our child would be born in 2006. Which means I would be a mother to a first grader this year. But I am not. I will never be. So school related topics are hard for me.

(since I have blocked tubes, our only possibility was IVF, but it did not work out. Our first dream was to get pregnant on our honey moon. It would be lovely to bring a baby back from New York / Niagara falls / Jasper National Park / Vancouver / San Francisco / Washington.  If that dream came true, our child would be already in 3rd grade).


Time to stop dreaming & to go to work! 


  1. (((HUGS))) Yeah, some topics are really tough and some things just tug at your heart no matter what. The second time we went back to Indo, I was thinking it'd be lovely if we could tell my Mom about our "good news" - but alas, it was not to be. But anyway, life has turned out to be much more beautiful than I could have dreamed of anyway, despite the fact that there is one dream that doesn't come true. :-)

  2. HI Klara....sending you hugs. I know how tough it is to let go of those dreams. I often let my thoughts go to where we would be if we had a child - how different would our lives be. I quickly get back to work as well and push that dream aside to make room for new dreams. Like Amel, my life has turned out to be much more beautiful than I could have dreamed of and for that I am so thankful!

  3. dear Mali & Amel & Kellie,
    thank you for hugs. They always help!

    I agree with you... also my life turned out beautiful and I am thankful.