I am a 50-something European woman doing what I once thought wasn't possible: finding happiness after infertility. While it's been a long, difficult and emotional journey (10 unsuccessful IVF treatments), each day I take another step down the path toward a fulfilling new life. This is my story of reinvention. I will be happy to hear from you: klara.soncek (@ ) gmail.com
Friday, March 28, 2014
Why doesn't Klara have children?
I spent the last few days in Italy, visiting some clients. I was alone. I had really lovely time. The more I am discovering Italy, the more I love it.
I have learned so much from Italians. For example:
- only Italians know how to prepare the cappuccino
- extra virgin olive oil is essential part of every dish
- the best dishes are very simple ones (photo was taken in summer: delicious bruschetta)
- when you meet people you know, kisses are essential part of greeting
- hanging out with family and friends is the most important part of life
There is one hotel where I usually stay when being in Friuli Venezia Giulia. I feel like at home there. Recently I discovered that they have a nice jogging path close by. It is lovely to start the day by jogging!
***
I was already in the office yesterday and my favourite coworker (few years younger, also childless-not-by-choice) told me about the lunch she had while I was absent.
There was group of coworkers that went to lunch together. And there was also one student (aged 26) that joined them. They were eating and then suddenly the student said: "I never asked Klara, but how come that she doesn't have children?". My favourite coworker just responded "I don't know." One another joked (I love him for this joke!) that she probably listened to another coworker who constantly complains what a hard work is having children and she decided not to have them. The others just looked at her at the odd way meaning like - can't you know what is appropriate to ask and what isn't. But the student didn't give up and kept asking how long had been Klara married already. And somebody just replied that for all detailed marital information she has to ask Klara :)
At the end of the lunch this stupid & rude student followed my childless coworker and she asked: "Well, I didn't ask you, how come that you don't have children?"
And my witty coworker just replied: "Well, you didn't ask." And with that she ended conversation.
***
My childless coworker told me this story yesterday evening, when we shared a bus ride back from the office. We laughed about it. It is good, when infertility doesn't hurt that much any more, when you can already laugh about it.
Now I have some time to get prepared for some witty answer when the rude student decides to ask me directly. Ideas welcome :)
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I love the joke your colleague made that you "probably listened to another co-worker who constantly complains what a hard work is having children and she decided not to have them." Sounds to me that you have some good colleagues/co-workers (I have to use both words because "co-worker" is an Americanism and unheard of in NZ and I can't bring myself to use it!) who were determined not to gossip behind your back.
ReplyDeleteAnd I am jealous you are back in Italy. I miss it. Sigh. Ciao!
Feel the same way as you and Mali -- both in loving all things Italian and in how you responded to this curious encounter. If there's one thing we can be sure of it is that some people lack conversational governors or a sense of what is and isn't appropriate social etiquette. Loved your co-worker's (okay, Mali - colleague's) quick wit!
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