There is a weird conversation that I had with our secretary at work yesterday (she is 26, nice, loves to chat, she just started to work couple of weeks ago).
I was preparing some tea for me when she entered the kitchenette (we were alone, since it was very early):
She: So, what about children?
Me: What children?
She: Your children.
Me: I do not have children.
She: I know you do not have children. So, when are you planing to have them?
Me: I am not planning. I am too old. So, when are YOU going to have children?
She: (Shocked by question). Well, I do not know. Not for some years, but I still have time. You are not too old. You can still have them.
Me: Well. I have 10 dead children. No alive child. And I will not have any children more.
The poor girl was shocked by my answer. She apologized briefly and went away. Then she avoided me for the rest of the day.
I felt total freedom. She will never ever ask me THAT question again.
I did not feel like explaining that my 10 children are only my embbies that decided not to stay with me. Those are parts of my life that I do not wish to remember any more: the deep sadness when the period arrived after IVF.
OH WOW...that's really awkward - her insistence especially. Geez...I'm glad you felt total freedom after that. And it's understandable why you don't want to explain more about your 10 children.
ReplyDeleteAs Amel said, very persistent of her to carry one with the questions. I often wonder what gives others the belief that it is allowable to keep questioning when someone clearly doesn't want to talk about not having children. I am envious of the poise you showed when you answered!
ReplyDeletedear Illanare,
Deleteto be frank, I am not good at finding the right answer at the right time.
But - I had prepared this answer few months ago - for the first very unpolite and rude person who will ask me THAT question in an unappropriate way.
I was more then happy to use it.
And I still feel good about it :)
Ugh, some people.... I think you handled it well. At least she won't keep trying to tell you that you still have time to try after this conversation.
ReplyDeleteKlara, you made me laugh. In delight. Because you said what you wanted and felt free. And I bet she doesn't ask THAT question again of anyone. At least, not in the same way. Good for you.
ReplyDelete