Saturday, February 9, 2019

The Power of Acknowledgement

I have just watched a brilliant short video that I got on Infertile Phoenix' blog:

https://infertilephoenix.blogspot.com/2019/02/the-power-of-acknowledgement.html

The video is just perfect and so very true.





Friday, February 1, 2019

Invisible

I have quit going out with some friends where I felt invisible. But then there are people you can't escape - like coworkers.

I often go for work lunch with a group of coworkers. They are all nice, kind and intelligent women. And they are also all mothers of children aged 2 to 14.

I don't mind some talk  about children. I understand that - the children are the most important part of their lives.

Today's lunch talk was plain awful. One started to talk about her birth control - she uses an intrauterine device that contains the hormone. And than she asked 5 of us at the same table casually: "I guess all of you use this method?"   

What could I reply to a silly question like this? I remained silent.

They all confirmed and started to go into lots of details.

I sat there for a while and felt completely invisible. 

I was envious. Not of their healthy children. But of how easy it is to connect with everybody if you have a "normal" life.   And once again it made me realize what an awkward person must I  seem to the rest. 

When I had enough, I thought of how to excuse myself. But I was so fed up, that I just didn't care. I just slipped from the table and went back to work. 

***

That's why I love coming home. Here I am safe.

Tuesday, January 29, 2019

A compliment

My dad has a colleague whom I have known since my childhood. During the construction works he also visited me and my husband to help some minor construction works done.

Today I met him again in my parents home. He asked me how is living in our new home. And then he asked me when there would be any news about our offspring. 

I politely replied that I am way too old for that now. 

***

Really? My 46th birthday is only weeks away and I was asked this silly question.

But then I thought about this question a bit further and decided that it is actually a compliment, when you are asked this question when 46. I guess I look younger than my actual age : )

Saturday, January 19, 2019

Happy & Healthy New Year!




First of all: a happy & healthy new year to all of you, my dear readers. In my country we always wish for happiness and health for the new year.

I know that most of new year resolutions don't last very long, but still. I will try.

I decided that from now on I will dedicate the focus of the new year to one thing.

The previous few years were dedicated to accepting my childless life and finding my happiness again. Done (at least most of the times).

Last year was dedicated to building our new home.  Done.

And this year: I will dedicate to getting my slim & fit body back again & to have my stomach healthy again (to handle my heart burn issues).

I won't be writing about this issues on my blog (since it is boring to most of the people). But... if you have any advice on my New Year's resolution, I would love to hear from you on: klara.soncek (@) gmail.com 

*****

We have had beautiful sunny winter for the last month, so I spent most of my free time walking through forest my beloved Wolf. A photo attached. Being lots of time outside on fresh air is so therapeutic!

****
I daily read BBC news and sometimes I find titles that bring sad memories back. Like this title:IVF couple have triplets after sex mistake.

I don't want to go into any details, but let me write only this. While being on IVF, my body was so miserable that having sex was the last thing on my mind.

Luckily BBC has also this old article: https://www.bbc.com/news/av/uk-northern-ireland-44967791/ivf-woman-we-just-decided-that-enough-was-enough

about enough is enough. I loved her sentence: "People will look at you and say: Oh my Godness, I understand. But nobody understands unless you actually went through it."

Exactly.

****

In the winter me and I husband are Netflix addicts for two months (and then HBO Go additicts for the next two months).

We have just watched on Netflix Private Life: https://www.netflix.com/si/title/80168222
It is brilliant!  We both loved it.