Isn't it a wonderful picture? I found it on Facebook, on my cousin's page. What a brave girl she is, my cousin!
I had a tough day. I visited with my coworker some clients (=bringing them presents for Christmas / New Year). The last meeting that we had was with women few years younger as me. I have known her for almost a decade. Once I even met her little boy and her husband. We meet once or twice a year. We do business. We chat, but never anything really personal.
Anyway. Today, after we wished each other good wishes for a year to come, she asked me: "How about children?".
I was shocked about the question (since I thought she knew I didn't have any). I just answered, very politely: "I don't have any children." (=full stop).
(If her further question would be - why not? - I would answer that I tried and I couldn't have a child.)
But - her further comment was: "I know. It is high time you had one."
This comment REALLY made me angry. How dare she comment anything? I answered: "I have 10 dead children."
But she didn't give up. Her comment was: "Well, you are still young, you can still have one."
And I answered: "I am not young, I am 40."
Then I just quickly said goodbye and just left.
After few hours when my anger already got smaller, I got a kind SMS from a rude client:
"Carissima Klara, scusa per prima, sono stata senza cuore. Un bacio."
Translation: "Dearest Klara, sorry for before, I was without heart. Kiss."
Lovely apology, isn't it? Italians really do have a style!
Glad in the end she apologized and realized her insensivity. I think most people just want to give us "hope" and don't want to leave with words on an uncomfortable note (you're still young, you can have one). It is almost like she didn't even hear you say "I have 10 dead children" and just continued on. Sad that we have to even have these kind of interactions with others and that they will never fully understand what it is like to be "childless".
ReplyDeleteOuch! I'm SO SORRY to hear about this. Of all the things people can say...geez!!!!
ReplyDeleteOn the bright side, though, that means you look younger than your real age, no? :-D
Does this client live in a cave, perhaps? That can be the only explanation for being so outrageously clueless. I'm sorry she had to ruin what was otherwise a perfunctory visit. (this client is also guilty of raising my blood pressure as I don't like to hear about my friends being put on the spot in such an accusing and insensitive way.)
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