Saturday, July 16, 2016

Do you live the life you want?

Few weeks ago I read an article in German magazine with a title "Leben Sie das richtige Leben?" / Do you live the life you want?

I was eager to read the article, but was once again deeply disappointed. Articles that include childless people are always so black-white, typical and very cliché.

The article starts with a single childless man around 50. He was enjoying his life, wearing Armani and enjoying freedom. Then one day he met a refugee aged 17 and realized that his own life is empty. He realized he wished to have a son so someone would be able to visit his grave one day. He wanted to leave a legacy behind. So he decided to adopt a 17-year-old boy. And now his life is meaningful.

Don't get me wrong, I am happy for this man (he looked very kind on the photo) if he found his happiness by adopting.  But what makes me angry are the clichés that journalists boost. Only very few among childless people wear Armani (and certainly not me). Yes, my life is childless, but certainly not meaningless. I do like visits of people close to my heart. I don't need anybody visiting me when I am gone.

What about my legacy? I don't have the need to leave anything major behind, except million small acts of kindness. That's how I wish to be remembered by different people.

***
I was working in my vegetable garden with Wolfie today and when going home, we met an older lady for the first time who wanted to cuddle Wolfie. Not many people want to do that since people are scared of large dogs. Wolfie was more than happy to be cuddled and I started to chat with the lady. She is 76 and she does a long walking tour every Saturday: around 20 - 25 kilometers! She was such a vivid kind old lady, you could feel her good energy. She told me that walking gives her freedom. That her mother was always telling to her and her siblings: "You should live each day as if you are going to die tomorrow." She is following her mother's advice so she uses each day to do something active and nice.

How I wish to be like her one day!  

 


6 comments:

  1. This is why there is so much bad information out there - cliches! I love your legacy and I agree with living each day. I had a colleague pass away quite suddenly this week and it is so true that you never know when your time will be.

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    1. dear Dipitie, I am sorry that your colleague passed away. Hugs.

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  2. I too cringe at both those stereotypes - that someone without children is selfish, and that having a child is the only way to give your life meaning.

    I'm trying to follow that lady's mother's advice, to live each day as if I'm going to die tomorrow, though I'm not walking around 20 kilometres any day, let alone today! (Today I made it Great-Uncle and Great-Nephew day, so I've had some time to myself!)

    So if I die tomorrow, I'm at least glad that I've told you this today - your million acts of kindness are a wonderful legacy, and much to be admired.

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  3. Dear Klara, what a beautiful goal you have! I am certain that your acts of kindness will be remembered. I hate those clichés, too, but then I guess people just do not know any better...

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  4. Hi Klara I've been thinking about legacy a lot as it's something that bothered me from my late 30s until recently. I like the idea of millions of small acts of kindness - how you live your life matters, not what comes after it. I think I've really come to the point where I don't care what happens after I'm gone (in terms of my being remembered etc.) But for a few years I had a real problem with it and lots of things (my belongings, my photos, everything I owned) became meaningless for me. The problem is, every magazine article / interview etc that you read glorifies having family. But I looked at my own family and saw what a strange thing legacy is - i tried to make sense of it here https://differentshoresblog.wordpress.com/2016/07/15/a-mothers-legacy-other-kinds/ but don't know if it will comfort or depress people!

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  5. Great advice from the old lady and geez...she's really disciplined. Thumbs up for her! I've been exercising/stretching a lot more, but I need to keep it up.

    And the cliche stuff makes me want to roll my eyes.

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